mental health my life


As you have probably guessed, I love motorbikes and anything motorbike related. Along with music, it’s an escape . When I’m riding, I’m free. In my head I’m the next Scott Redding, although I’m nearly 40 years to old to dream of starting to race.

I love how the bike feels beneath me, how I can feel the road (hopefully still on the bike and not on my arse). The sound the exhaust makes. Its a full aftermarket akrapovic race exhaust (yes officer, it is legal……..ish). The way I have to move my body around to get the bike around corners at speed (within the speed limit officer). I love being in full control, knowing my limits and the limits of the bike.

I currently ride a yamaha MT07. Not the biggest or fastest bike on the road, but so much fun. It will do 0 to 60mph in 3.8 seconds and has a top speed of 130mph. Obviously I would have no idea if either of these figures are true 🤫. Its very lightweight, easy to throw around and wheelies very easily (apparently).

My MT07

Now, I don’t know if it is because of my medication, or the fact that bikes don’t scare at all, but I have noticed that my heart rate doesn’t increase at all when I’m riding. Wierd.

Bikers themselves are like the polar opposite of car drivers ( I also own and drive a car). Whenever we see a fellow biker on the road, we nod our head in recognition. Even bikers that have pulled over will still nod and wave. You don’t get that among car drivers. Bikers are among the friendliest people I have ever met. It’s like a brother/sisterhood. At bike shows everyone is so polite and will stop and talk. It really feels like being part of something.

Obviously I am extremely venerable on a bike and sometimes almost invisible to other road users. I would never go out without wearing the full protective clothing at anytime. Riding really helps to clear my head. If you ride or are thinking about starting, please be safe. Your life matters.

mental health

Chemical warfare

Thats whats going on inside my brain right now. Over the past few weeks the dose of my sertraline has changed from 50mg to 100mg to 150mg down to 50mg and now back to 100mg. Surely this can’t be good for me? The trouble is, when you call your doctors you always speak to someone different. Some believe in anxiety medication, while others don’t. I need consistency.

Sertraline belongs to a class of drugs called selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. A class of drugs is a group of medications that work in a similar way. These drugs are often used to treat similar conditions.This drug works by increasing the amount of serotonin, a natural substance in your brain, that helps maintain mental health balance. This can improve the symptoms of depression and anxiety. By changing the dose so much my brain must think what the hell is going on!

If the medical “professionals” can’t agree on the right treatment program, what chance do I have? The last two days for me have not been good. I haven’t wanted to leave me flat. It’s a shame because apparently the weather is lovely. I guess I should open my curtains really.

I’m pushing myself today. I’m going to go out on my bike and see some friends. I really wish I knew what has brought my current “episode” on. I’ve never been this bad before and I’m determined to never get like this again. As soon as everything has settled down hopefully I will have a clearer picture in my mind.

Not doing much to bulletproof myself am I?